thanks http://www.photographyblog.com/forums/index.php?act=Print&client=printer&f=17&t=3579 for the image provided.
dont wanna get into any trouble for that.
lol.


People who looks forward towards my perth post. Sorry to disappoint u all again): Coming to think of it, V day is a good way to rewinding back into the past, back to my 18 years on life on earth.

Honestly speaking, life wasnt been good, i wasnt born in a well off family, and i wasnt sad about it, im a easily contented, but my family relationship wasnt well off, i have 2 sisters, in which one doesnt really gives much a damn about this family i have to say, i doesnt really have much idea why she treats us this way. Maybe its just plain different, not just the normal so so ideal family relationships u seen in the dramas. My dad i gonna say i lived with fear around him, there seems to be very little fun with him, maybe just during family outings i guess. Other than that, its just plain scolding and cries of me.

Lets take a look at my mischief records

I was caught playing with fire for 3 times, chased out of house because of it. Mind you, im only 6.

It ended all crying when reports cards came back home, leaving me either to kneel without meals or overnight, the only time in which that didnt happen was when im primary 2, with me scoring 3rd in class in the last class, earning me a trip to LA. This is maybe due to the high standards my sisters set for me. His always on a constant threatening of ending my studies from p5 onwards, leading me to the tot of suicide for the good of this family when i was 11.

Eldest sister: damai pri (PSLE 240)
2nd sister: damai pri (PSLE 262)
Me: damai pri (PSLE 226)

Eldest sister: chung cheung high main (O levels ???)
2nd sister: duman high ( L1r5 11)
Me: Damai secondary (L1r5 18)

Eldest sister: (SP)
2nd sister: (TJC)
ME: (SAJC all thanks to canoeing)

My dad rush home without finishing his work, when i was p5 to throw my bag into the rubbish chute, because i wasnt studying for my major exams in june and happily watching tv. And i wasnt allowed in the house when i brought my bag back.

The lies in which i told my dad resulted in crazy returns, bringing me thousands of lines of writing. i remembered once when during p5, after exams i was supposed to go out to celebrate yinah bday, but it was the first time i was going out, so i didnt dare say, but lied to do project. How stupid i am, leading to me being exposed for giving a house number of my friend.

The most significant thing about my dad was about how strict he was and easily angered. i rmb that was once he lock my sis out of the house when she was just late for 1 min. Which resulted my mom quarreling with him, of cold wars of almost 1 month. And he was best in sarcasm, when u do something wrong, he can just shoot you till the edge, e.g u hang out till late, he'll call u as a ah beng that would be jail for something when u grow out, a good for nothing on the phone when he calls back home look for mummy to ask about stocks. When his ur daddy. UR daddy.

Although he passed away when i was sec 3, im still very grateful for how strict he is, to brought me up as a guy with manners and maturity, i would never imagine what i would become in damai if he was not there.

What hurts the most is that, when he was in his last few weeks of living, there was still constant anger which started of with me and my sisters, so for that 2 weeks his been leading his conclusion that 3 of us are out to anger him to death. Thats what hurts the most, when it really came true.

When lifes isnt as good as it is in ur family, people do turn towards their friends, making them no. 1.

Life in primary school should be the best, it was just plain playing playing and playing. i still remember i was playing basketball or soccer everyday after school when i was p3. Only to return home when the danger was near. I have to admit, im sometimes a bully in school to those small kids.

I remember once when there was a kid who said he doesnt like damai pri, i was p5 then, i scolded him and pushed him to the next school beside us, bedok west, and ask him to enroll there, he must have been frightened, i think he was only p2 then. i stopped till a old man saw what i was doing. Hahas.

My first fight was in p1, during children's day. U know the days when teachers gives kids sweets and chocolate. It was afetr school, while walking home, i remembered i snatch his sweet for fun, playing hard to get, he got so fed up that he punch me in the stomach, returning back, i gave him a strike on the back. Leading me to the P office the next day with his parents coming to school. Come to think of it, it was quite funny.

And im grateful to see my first clique formed, of me eunice, yinah, weili, delin, kenneth and sanche. THE SEVENTH. 11 years of friendship, and its still going


And there are many more, like ili, caline, addie, fir, ashraf, daniel, simon, hwee juan, pehchen, quan liang, hong yun and many more, hard to name it all.



Moving on the secondary school life, life during sec 1 and 2 was like just leadin on with my primary school mindset. With more friends known, and the start of my canoeing life, along with work, and the start of my BGR.

Life wasnt bad in secondary school, as i can say in heaviily in the influence of all devils tot, all u can think of. Smoking, gambling, gangs. Things like that, and im glad i held strong, becoming who i am.

Many cliques was form, but it seems that all these turn down to waste, when all cliques combine and i became rejected to some issues, which i dont wish to talk about it again. approach me if you really wanna know. im a social person, friends are my number 1. its just hurts when they do not call u out for outing when theres one. IT HURTS.

JOHN LITTLE Cliques, Breekz cliques, Damai sec 1 to 2 cliques, sec 3 to 4 cliques, Damai canoeing cliques. Thanks for the memories, even though some of them are real painful.

BGR in secondary wasnt really successful, and i guess maybe its time to give some apologies and thanks.

To fiona leong: i think its kinda weird to be talking about you since friendship is kinda gone, but i still gonna say sorry. for things that i shouldnt have done. hope ur leading a good life now.

To dorothy, thanks for that happy 48 days u gave me, even though it was short. it was meaning and important to me.

To joyce: thanks for the memories u gave me.

i gonna admit, i like people easily, so, dont be too nice to me, u might be next(:



Life at the end of secondary 4 was quite desperate enough to leave damai, friends are left to move on, and maybe its time i do, and im greatful that i make friends who are much better to me, along with my dearest SA canoeing team, and my coach(:

hmm, things are some how coming to an end now, its late and maybe i should catch some sleep.
(:

A SAD CLOWN.
Always there to cheer people on,
looking bright and always happy.
but whats inside,
doesnt seems the way its suppose to be.


Depressionist_Jay
once again. tonight.